If one thing is for sure, I cannot be a writer if I don’t actually write. The spreadsheet I’ve created for my writing log is populated with more zeros over the last couple of weeks than I care to see. So I’m focused more than ever on my intentions – why I want to do this, what is important to me, where I choose to spend my time. Merriam-Webster defines intent as “the thing that you plan to do or achieve – an aim or purpose.” For all of my adult life, I have been driven by something that I want to achieve. Sure, there have been times when someone else has set the goal for me or it’s a job I am being paid to do, but for the tasks I finish with an extra push and for the achievements I’m most proud of, the motivation comes from within. The intent is my own.

As I look at all those sad, accusatory zeros glaring at me I’m forced to examine my intentions and take note of where I’m spending my “free” time, if not writing. (I put that word into quotations because as a full-time working mom of three and of course, wife, there isn’t an abundance of not-accounted-for time.) The goal of writing a novel was created by me, for me – so where’s the disconnect? Now is the time for my corporate training to take over – analyze the situation and related issues, brainstorm on potential solutions, draft a plan to achieve the best solution possible, include milestones, incorporate accountability, set deadlines. Go.

Analysis: 1) My job is demanding and frankly, pays a bit more than writing for now, so there will be times when I have to work instead of write. 2) I need to cut myself a little slack for being human. It’s okay to have down weeks, it’s okay to need to sleep and it’s completely normal to not always feel inspired to write every day. But for some reason in my crazy brain I have to write this down to even begin to let go of what I’ll categorize as achiever’s guilt. 3) My kids and my husband come first and I need to factor in family distractions. Case in point (and I am NOT making this up): writing this note I have been interrupted twice to get snacks, once for coloring supplies, once for a bubble emergency and then again because my three-year-old put an entire roll of paper in the toilet, but I can’t get mad because he went on his own. I have to plan for the unexpected.

Brainstorm (stream of consciousness): Write late at night, no wine at dinner so I’m not sleepy, leave the house to write, write in chunks, make some outlines of scenes when I have time and fill in the rest later, be patient with kids, don’t force writing if it’s not working, sleep is good, avoid distractions I can control like Facebook, schedule my time deliberately.

Plan: Basically organize the above bullet into a true work schedule for writing and be more relaxed about those unexpected interruptions. Even I have to admit the toilet paper thing is kind of funny…

Accountability: That’s you – my friends and family.

Deadline: I’m anticipating this book will take a year to finish, but I sure hope it’s sooner.

Sometimes we need to let go of old habits in order to create space for new ones, or revise outdated goals in favor of the updated version. I’m determined to take my well-honed productivity habits and apply them to my writing. I’m adjusting my outlook so that I will enjoy the creative process rather than just muscling my way through it.  And I’m being intentional about my time and my goals every step of the way.

Now off to fix that toilet.