Many friends and family have asked about my NaNoWriMo progress and if I was able to achieve my goal of writing 50,000 words in November. I didn’t. I wrote 32,008 words. I guess you could say I failed (even though I have 32,008 more words than I had before). To be honest, I was pretty hard on myself not only for not reaching the 50,000 mark but also for my writing abilities, or lack thereof. Not willing to stay down for long, I pulled myself out of the miserable pit of defeat and back onto the plain of stubborn optimism to instead reflect on what I learned last month. It was a time of discovery and most certainly a mark of my journey on this well-charted path, which brings me to my first lesson.

The first thing I learned is that I am not the only writer to ever feel inadequate and incapable of finishing what I started. A project like a novel can feel very daunting, even overwhelming at times when you try to consider the entire work in a condensed way. This path is not only well-charted, it’s paved; complete with road signs, mile markers and maps that present themselves before you even know that you’re lost. I read countless articles and blog posts from other writers who have traveled this road before me and the recollection of each person’s experience has been incredibly helpful. Every writer doubts themselves at some point along the way. I suppose you could say it’s a rite of passage to becoming an author, but I now know these are essential emotions to keep pushing yourself to improve.

Something else I didn’t know before last month is exactly how long it takes me to write 1,000 words. One hour, that’s it. Most likely people who are full-time authors can write more quickly than this, but for me knowing my current hourly average makes the end goal much more attainable. When I had limited time or there were distractions around me, I would outline scenes, often creating several scenes in ten to fifteen minutes. When an opportunity presented itself for uninterrupted quiet, I would quickly review a scene to jog my memory, start typing away, and the next thing I knew the chapter was complete. Interestingly, the absolute most productive writing I experienced was on airplanes. I’m not sure if it was the ambient noise, the hour or so of unconnected time or the flight attendant staring me down to close my laptop, but anytime I fly I’m guaranteed at least 1,500 words, even more for longer flights. Thankfully my work requires periodic trips around the country, otherwise this would be a very expensive way to complete a novel.

There were many other lessons I learned over the last month including the importance of visiting my story every day to solve plot quandaries, the practice of just writing without self-editing and the value of storyboarding. But perhaps the most essential lesson for me personally was the validation that I truly enjoy writing. I am admittedly goal-oriented and stubborn enough to follow through on what I say I will do, but this isn’t just about achieving a goal. I genuinely love it. Completing scenes, filling the holes in my story and getting inside each character to ultimately solve the puzzle of the finished product has brought a different level of fulfillment unlike anything I’ve ever accomplished in my career. And activating this center of creative thinking has only led to more ideas – I already have another storyline for a second novel I want to write, completely unrelated to the first one. I didn’t win NaNoWriMo this year, but all is not lost. I continue my pattern of outlining scenes and knocking out 1,000 words at a time, remaining fully invested in my characters and their denouement. And best of all I have affirmed my passion and joy for the craft of writing.